Wednesday, November 17, 2010

Tara, Misu & Their Just Desserts (Ch. 6)

Everett approached her as she was leaving her locker. He was wearing a new, multicolored sweater vest, and his penny loafers had the same three colors on them. She thought to herself that he had a lot of style sense. He reminded her of her friend Dominick Dean. He always had a new pair of shoes and matched perfectly, too. She smiled at him as he asked, “How were your holidays? You went to Salt Lake with Anne didn’t you?”

“Yeah, I had a lot of fun with her family,” she said, thinking of Allen. “Once I got home, it wasn’t so great, though. My mom and dad are fighting like cats and dogs lately, and it got so bad this morning that the word ‘divorce’ actually came up.”

Everett put his arm around her, and asked if she wanted to go sit on the bench down the hall and talk. “I have something I want to talk to you about, too.”

Tara went around the corner to tell Beth she was going to stay at school for a little while longer, then joined Everett on the bench.

“So what’s up?” she asked.

“No you go first. I need to get up the courage to tell you what I am going through.”

Tara got nervous about what he had to say, but she started telling him what had been going on with her family during the holidays.
“You know John Angelo?” When Everett nodded, she went on. “My dad has been helping his dad remodel their house, and sometimes he doesn’t come home. Even when he comes home, he has been acting all secretive, and he’s either on top of the world or down in the dumps all the time. My mom accused him of using drugs and he flew off the handle. He started accusing her of having an affair with one of her co-workers because he sometimes drives her home. We all know she works long hours to support all of us. She wouldn’t have the energy to have an affair. She threatened to get a divorce if she ever found out he was using drugs, and he threatened to divorce her if she ever came home with any of her male co-workers again. He says he is going to start checking up on her at work, too. I don’t know what to think. Everyone says that the Angelos deal drugs, and my dad has been there a lot, but I can’t believe he would just start doing drugs at his age. As far as my mom having an affair, she is so tired when she gets off work, that she sometimes just falls into bed with all her clothes on. I really don’t think she even likes the District Manager that she car pools with. She said he bores her with stories about comic characters. All I know is that my dad isn’t acting like himself, and my mom is getting more and more resentful about him not having a full time job.”

“I think I know how you feel,” Everett said. “My parents separated when I was two, but my oldest sister and mom are always talking about what a bum he is, and how he never sends any child support. I have only seen him a couple of times since he moved out because he lives in Michigan, but he seems like a nice guy. I know he hasn’t been perfect, but I have a hard time believing he is as bad as my mom says he is. In the few times I have seen him, he hugged me and told me he loved me more than my mom has in my entire life. I wonder sometimes if she likes me at all. She talks about men like they are all evil and no good.”

Tara had only met Everett’s mom once, but his older sisters all seemed to treat him like a second class citizen. They had always treated her with respect and involved her in their conversations, but he didn’t seem to exist in their world unless they wanted something from him. Knowing he was on the brink of saying something important now, she turned sideways on the bench to look him straight in the eye.

“So what’s up with you?”, she asked. “What did you need to tell me?”

Everett fidgeted a little, and turned toward her, then looking up and down the hall to make sure no one was within earshot, he asked, “Do you think it is normal for me to have no desire to have sex?”

Tara was shocked by the question, but recovering quickly, she asked him what exactly he meant.

“Do you mean with Anne, or at all? I mean, we aren’t supposed to have sex with someone we aren’t married to, but I guess most guys think about it and want it most of the time.” She could tell she hadn’t given him the answer he wanted, so she went on. “ I know I appreciate the fact that you aren’t constantly talking about women’s body parts or watching a girl’s backside as she walks away from you. I’m glad you aren’t like the other guys.”

Everett shook his head, and kept starting to say something, “No, I meant…What I am trying to say is…It isn’t really about Anne”, but he couldn’t seem to finish any of his sentences, so he finally just said, “Never mind, it’s not a big deal”, and they continued talking about things that were a little easier to talk about for about half an hour, then went home. Tara had almost forgotten the conversation by the end of February. There were more important things on her mind.

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Tara was walking through Albertson’s looking for something to snack on when she ran into her distant cousin Marie. It had been almost five years since she had seen her, and she had grown up fast. It was hard to believe the 9-year-old she remembered was now a 14-year-old she hardly recognized. It was instantly obvious that Marie was at least eight months pregnant. Tara tried not to stare at her stomach as she talked to her. She just made small talk and asked how everyone was in the Paul side of the family.
Marie finally cut the tension by asking, “So no one in the family told you I was pregnant did they?” When Tara shook her head, Marie went on. “I could tell by the way you keep staring at my belly. Don’t be embarrassed. Everyone does it. Grandma and my bishop are pressuring me to give it up, and my mom keeps trying to hide me from the neighbors, but I plan to keep it, so everyone is going to find out anyway.” She stopped to take a breath and Tara began asking questions.

“Who’s the father? How far along are you? Are you going to finish school? Do you know if it’s a girl or a boy? How could Grandma want you to give it up? “

With every answer, Marie made it very clear that she had thought it all through and knew what she planned to do.

“Max is actually eighteen, and he has his own apartment, so I am moving in with him as soon as Kara is born. His apartment is right across the street from my Grandma Paul, so I will have family nearby. In fact, my uncle Dan is still living at home, and he has been helping me out a lot. Max and Dan spend a lot of time together. That side of the family isn’t LDS, so they aren’t as judgmental about it.”

Tara knew how that was. She felt like every move she made was against some rule the church had. She could handle it better if everyone around her wasn’t breaking the rules too, and not getting caught. Just the day before, she had been coming out of Maverik after buying gas, and Sister King scolded her for shopping on Sunday. As she hung her head and drove away, she realized that Sister King was doing the exact same thing. Deep inside, she felt Marie had really gotten herself into a fix, though. It made her realize how important the rule about not dating until you are sixteen really was. In fact, looking at Marie, she wondered why the Prophet didn’t forbid dating until eighteen or twenty-five.

Marie gave her a hug and said, “I hope you can come see the baby after it is born. We will be living in Double Tree Apartments, #32 if you want to stop by in a couple of weeks.”

“I can’t wait!” Tara squealed. Despite Marie’s age and the problems the baby would probably cause, Tara was glad to have a baby in the family. “It will be almost like having a niece or nephew.”

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When Tara got home, she asked her dad if he knew his cousin was going to be a grandma. He just grunted and said, “I don’t know why you think that is something to be proud of.” Then he plopped down on the couch, closed his blood shot eyes, and went to sleep.

Tara started cleaning up all the candy bar wrappers he had left around the living room and thought about what she had heard about drug users getting the “munchies”. Once again she wondered if her father could possibly be an addict. “Don’t be ridiculous!” she told herself, and went to finish her report for Mrs. Thompson’s class.

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A week later, the day after Valentines Day, Kara Maxine Phelps was born. She was 7 lbs. 6 oz., and had the most gorgeous blue eyes Tara had ever seen. She sat in Max and Marie’s apartment rocking her and playing with her fingers and toes. “I can’t believe how tiny she is!” she exclaimed. “I don’t remember B.C. ever being this small.”

Marie laughed and replied, “You were a lot younger when your sister was born. When your mom realized she was going to have a surprise, Ethan and I were about seven or eight, so that would have made you almost 10. He was hoping for a brother so bad, and instead he got his third sister.”

“Yeah, actually Bridget Camille never was this small. She was almost 10 pounds when she was born.” Tara said, wincing at the thought of trying to give birth. “So is it really as bad as they say? Did it hurt a lot?”

Marie winced and said, “Let’s just say, the pain is so bad you think you are going to die, then it gets worse and you wish you could die just to end the pain.” Then she laughed, and went on. “Actually, by the time I was in the regular room, I had pretty much forgotten how bad it really was. I just remember what I was thinking at the time.”

“Ouch! I can’t even imagine having that much pain. My menstrual cramps are bad enough. I throw up from the pain, and practically spend two days and two nights with a hot water bottle strapped to my waist. I didn’t think anything could hurt worse than that!” Tara exclaimed.

Marie was laughing because Max came in the room just in time to hear Tara say ‘menstrual’, and hurried right back out again.

Tara asked, “Doesn’t it bother you that Max smokes? I didn’t notice the smell until he came in just now, but doesn’t he stink like smoke all the time? Does he always smoke outside or does he smoke around the baby?”

Marie replied, “You sound just like my parents. They point out all the things about Max that are against the Word of Wisdom or something else in the church, as if I didn’t know he isn’t Mormon. They seem to think they can turn me against him or something, but it won’t happen. He is very careful not to smoke anywhere near the baby, and he only drinks a couple of beers once in a while. He loves me and the baby and we love him. That is all that matters. Please don’t be like them. I was hoping you would support me.”

Tara felt awful. “I wasn’t trying to judge the fact that he smokes. Maybe I was being a little self-righteous about it, but I just was worried about the smoke making the baby sick. Not because of the Word of Wisdom, but because of the health risks. I just hate the smell, mostly. Max seems nice and I think he cares about you and the baby. I would never try to talk you into breaking up with him.”

Marie threw her arms around Tara’s neck and said, “Thank you. I knew I could count on you. You were always the one in the family that stuck up for the rebels.” Then she teased, “Even if you never were one.”

Tara pushed her away and swatted at her. “You act like that is a bad thing. Don’t you know I am going to be rewarded in the after life for having such a boring life?”
She laughed and went on. “I just don’t have any interest in most of the things that would get me into trouble. I tried most everything, but never liked any of it. But that doesn’t mean you or Max or anyone else should be treated like dirt just because of the choices you have made. I think childbirth was punishment enough.”

Marie laughed. “Yeah, that’s for sure. I really regret getting pregnant with Max, but I would be lying if I said I regret having Kara. My life is going to be a lot more complicated, and I won’t get to do a lot of things I used to be able to do, but she is worth it. I am happy just being a mom to her and like a wife to Max. My mom thinks I am just ‘playing house’ and it will get boring after a while, but I like taking care of them. I have a lot more respect for my parents now. I just wish they could respect my decisions.”

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Everett, Anne and Tara spent a lot of time together, and with Anne on the Student Council, there were a lot of times Tara and Everett were alone together. As the school year got closer and closer to an end, Everett seemed to get more and more like a stranger. Tara wasn’t sure what was going on, but she knew he just wasn’t the same. During the month she was so busy with the baby and Marie, Everett had started wearing tee shirts and jeans (well-pressed jeans) instead of his khakis and sweater vests. He had cut his hair so short it looked like he had joined the army, instead of wearing it a little long on top, and had even let the natural color grow back. She had never really cared for the dye jobs he used to do, but they were part of him, and now they were gone. He had started acting all “macho” and was really starting to get on her nerves.

One day after she had been up all night with Kara, so Marie and Max could have a day off, she overheard Everett telling Russell Blake what a wild woman Anne was. She was sure he was lying, but either way, Anne’s reputation was on the line. She pulled Everett aside, and gave him an earful. While she was at it, she began to ask him about all the other strange things that were happening.

“You told me a couple of weeks ago that you were going to ask Anne to marry you, and now you are making her sound like a slut! What has happened to you? I thought you didn’t have any interest in sex! What has happened to change you so much?”

She paused to give him a chance to explain, but instead he just walked away. Tara went to find Anne.

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Anne was in the library with the Senior Class President discussing the upcoming Spring Fling. Tara waited for them to finish, then told Anne they better go find Everett.

She was shocked when Anne spat, “I don’t care where he is or what he is doing. Kevin just told me that everyone is talking about the ‘good time’ I gave Everett last night. I can’t believe he is telling everyone!”

“You mean you and Everett . . . ”

“Not what you think,” Anne explained. “We just started talking about marriage and that led to the wedding, which led to the honeymoon, and one thing led to another until we were both down to our underwear. I think I would have let things keep going, but all of a sudden Everett backed off, got dressed, and ran out. Just as I was buttoning my jeans, Russell came in the locker room, but he didn’t say anything, so I didn’t think he suspected anything.”

“That’s why I came to get you. Russell and Everett were just talking about last night, and Everett was implying that you and he went all the way.” Tara hugged Anne as she started to cry, then told her how worried she was. “I think Everett is just confused and dealing with something, and he is doing whatever it takes to get someone’s attention. I don’t know if he is trying to get you to pay more attention to him, or his family, or what, but he is acting really weird. I am afraid he is just going to get more and more desperate unless we find out what is going on.”

“He seemed okay to me, until this,” Anne sighed. “I have wondered about his change of clothes and hair, but thought he just wanted a change. I don’t think it is anything to worry about.”

Tara chose her words carefully. “I have been around him more than you have lately, Anne. He has become an egotistical jerk, acting all macho and disrespectful. He actually went to Gary’s bachelor’s party last week. Did you know that?”

“I knew he was thinking about it, but all they did was go down to Poky to see the tractor pulls and stopped off at a bar on the way home. Everett was going to be the designated driver.”

Tara considered the situation and decided if she had to choose between loyalty to Everett or to Anne, she had to choose Anne. “Ryan told Beth that they went to Gary’s and hired a stripper from Jackson. She was all over everyone there, including Everett. He said Everett seemed to be enjoying the party while he was there, then talked about how disgusting the girl was all the way home. Ryan thought Everett was acting a little hypocritical after the way he was acting at the party.”

Anne asked, “What do you mean, hypocritical? He has never liked girls who flaunt their bodies. He has always been very clear about that.”

“But he has changed, Anne. Can’t you see how he is acting like ‘one of the guys’ more and more, and like himself less and less?”

“I guess I have just taken him for granted a little bit lately,” Anne sighed. “He has always been too good to be true, but I was just thinking how nice it was that he doesn’t mind me spending so much time with Student Council stuff. He was always there when I needed him, and he treated me with respect. Until now. Maybe I pressured him a little too much about a temple marriage. He keeps saying he doesn’t feel worthy to get sealed, but he won’t say why. I have asked about all the sins I can think of, and he says he hasn’t committed any of them. He even refuses to watch an R-rated movie or to shop on Sunday.”

Tara rubbed her temples to ease the headache that was coming on. “He obviously feels guilty about something. At the very least, he hasn’t been treating women in general with much respect lately. I don’t blame him for not liking the way his sisters and mother treat him, but he used to respect other women.”

Anne put her arm around Tara and said, “Let’s go find him and make him talk to us.”
“I think you should talk to him alone, at least at first. Why don’t I meet you guys at Bogarts in about an hour? If you aren’t done talking by then, just leave a message with Ryan. He should be working tonight. I think I should go take some heavy-duty painkillers and take a nap.”

As Tara walked away, she couldn’t help feeling like there was something she was missing about Everett’s behavior, but she couldn’t quite put her finger on it. When she showed up at Bogarts later that night, Everett was already waiting, and he was alone.

“Where’s Anne?” she asked. “I thought she was coming with you.”

“She found me at Andy Michaels’s house and asked if I wanted to come to Bogarts and have a talk, but just as we got here, your sister’s boyfriend said he had a message from Anne’s parents and she had to leave. I decided to eat and go home. What are you doing here?”

“I wanted to ask you what is going on with you,” Tara explained, ” but I didn’t want to pry into you and Anne’s business without her here. I just can’t believe you are telling everyone that you guys had sex! I am sorry about the way I yelled at you earlier, but I am just so frustrated trying to figure you out lately. One day you are like my best friend, asking about my family and acting like you really care about me, and the next you are telling a group of guys that you ‘have to be nice to the fat girls’. I know you didn’t think that would get back to me, but this is a small town, Everett. I am comfortable with my appearance, and I know I didn’t imagine all the nice things you have said and done for me. I know you aren’t ashamed to be seen with me. Or at least you didn’t used to be. What has changed? Why are you acting like such a jerk lately, and what is with your hair?” She reached up to rub his nearly bald head, and said, “Or should I say your lack of hair?”

Everett reached up to run his hands through his hair out of habit, and finding none, he laughed at himself, then got serious. “A few weeks ago, my mother called me a faggot.” When Tara gasped, he just nodded his head and went on. “ It really made me mad at the time, but I started thinking about how I really feel, and maybe she’s right. I don’t think about girls and sex as much as the other guys seem to. Then I remembered something I said to my dad one time when I was about nine. We were watching a football game, and I pointed to one of the players and said, ‘I want to marry him.’ My dad just brushed it off right then, but later he questioned me about it. I thought a lot about it, and decided I didn’t really want to marry that guy, but I wanted to be with someone like him. I had this picture in my head of living in a house with someone strong like him. My dad tried to joke about it by saying I would be living with a lot of different guys on my mission, and that all guys like to think they have friends to back them up and protect them. He even blamed himself about it, saying I was just trying to find the kind of relationship he and I should have had all these years. He tried to convince me, and I think himself, that I wasn’t weird or something. I kind of forgot about it until the last few months. The closer I get to marrying Anne, the more I feel like I have some feelings to sort out. I really don’t think I am attracted to other guys. I am not gay. I can’t be. I just don’t know how to explain how I am feeling. All the changes I am making are because of my bishop.”

Tara broke in to ask, “You talked to your bishop about all this? What did he say?”

Everett laughed and said, “I am trying to tell you, Tara. I am just trying to do this at my own pace. Don’t rush me. This is very hard to talk about with anyone, but you are my girlfriend’s best friend, my friend, and a girl. You should feel lucky that I can talk to you at all.” He slugged her playfully and went to refill his drink.

As he was returning to the table, Anne came in and Tara could tell Everett didn’t want to continue their conversation right then. He did skirt around the issue and told both girls that he had told his bishop about his feelings of unworthiness and that his bishop had advised him to “Follow the example of the other guys in his Priesthood quorum,” so he had been trying to fit in a little more by wearing the same kind of clothes, and cutting his hair, and somewhere along the line he had gone too far by trying to fit in a little too much.

He apologized for all the things he had said and done to hurt Tara and Anne, and promised to clear it all up and do better. By the time he and Anne left, they were holding hands and looked like nothing would ever come between them.

Tara went home, and pulled out her old photo albums, searching for a time when she felt carefree. It seemed the older she got, the more complicated things got. “How did the world get so complicated all of a sudden?” she wondered. “I thought I could deal with just about anything until Roland came along and turned my world upside down. Now it seems like just when I think the worst has happened, something else happens to me or someone I love.” She was absently turning pages, and suddenly dropped the album when she saw a picture of Dominick smiling up at her and realized what had been bugging her all day. She ran to the phone to call Dom’s sister.

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Bella answered, sounding a little impatient. Tara identified herself, and asked how everyone was.

“Gills? Is it really you? I haven’t heard from you since I moved to Yah-Tah-Hey five years ago. Dom says you got your heart broken by some jerk down here. How close is he to New Mexico? I know some people, who know some people, if you know what I mean.”

Tara laughed at her fake accent, and the use of her dreaded nickname. Ever since she almost drowned in the pool at Grand Targhee, Dom’s family had called her Gills. Most people assumed it was just her last name shortened, so she didn’t have to explain it to very many people.

“Roland isn’t worth the effort. He is just a mixed up guy with a lot of problems that I thought we could overcome together. I was wrong, and I am trying to deal with it one day at a time. Right now, I am more worried about a friend of mine. Do you remember the heart to heart Dom had with you and me the night you caught me and Dom half dressed in the basement? Do you remember what Dom said about loving me but not wanting to have sex with me, and he went on to say something about not wanting to have sex with anyone? Later, he told us both that he sometimes thought he was never going to get married because he had never looked at a girl the way most sixteen-year-old boys do, and he couldn’t imagine ever feeling that way, and he…”

Bella cut in and dropped a bombshell. “I thought you knew Gills. Dom came out to the family last year. He dropped out of school and moved to Wyoming with his boyfriend. I don’t know why he hasn’t told you. Everyone else seems to know. How long has it been since you talked to him?”

“I lost your parents’ number after they moved. I tried to call your grandparents, but they were never home. After a while, I just gave up. It has been at least three years.”

While Tara paused to let it all sink in, Bella asked, “So what does Dom’s sexual orientation have to do with this friend of yours?”

Tara was still in shock, and didn’t know how to explain why she thought Dom and Everett were so much alike. They were really complete opposites, now that she thought about it. "What was it about Everett that made me think he was like Dom?” she thought. “Was it just the clothes they wear? The way they talked? I can’t quite put my finger on it. There is just something about them both that sets them apart from the other guys I have known. What is it?”

“Gills, are you still there?”, Bella was saying. “I hope I didn’t shock you too much. I thought he’d tell you first. You seemed to know everything else before he told us. I’m sure he meant to tell you. Maybe he was just scared that you wouldn’t understand, but I don’t know how he would think that would make a difference to you. You guys were like siamese twins.”

“Yeah, I’m still here. I am just struggling with why I didn’t know all along. Were there signs I should have picked up on?” Tara made a joke by saying, “I guess I should have known when he was the only guy friend I had that didn’t try to get in my pants.”

Bella laughed, and answered, “He told us he didn’t really even admit it to himself until he met Cooper. He knew he was different, but he thought he would grow out of it or something. What is going on with this friend of yours?”

Again Tara tried to identify the feeling she was having in the pit of her stomach. “I don’t know what to say, Bella. I have this friend who has been dating the same girl for almost three years, and is planning to ask her to marry him. He is a really good guy; he goes to church every week, doesn’t drink or do drugs or anything, but when it comes to actually making plans to get sealed in the temple, he keeps saying he doesn’t feel worthy.”

“Why isn’t he going on a mission?” Bella asked.

“His mother thinks it is more important for him to go to college and get a good job, and if you knew his mother, you would understand why he has never felt like that was something he has a choice about. In fact, if she didn’t like Anne, Everett wouldn’t have been allowed to date her. That woman has an iron grip on her family, and no one will stand up to her.”

“Sounds like we should be feeling sorry for this Anne girl if she is going to have this woman for a mother-in-law,” Bella joked. “What happens when she decides she doesn’t like something that they are doing and butts into their life?”

“I have had many conversations with Everett and Anne about that very subject, and he insists that as soon as he can get out of her house, he won’t let her in his life anymore. That isn’t the biggest problem right now, though . . . ”

“Maybe he is just feeling guilty about not going on a mission,” Bella cut in. “Maybe that is why he doesn’t feel worthy.”

Tara thought about that, and wished she could believe that could be the problem. “I think it is more serious than that,” she sighed. “I think he and Dom may have something in common. I can’t really put my finger on it, but there is something about the way Everett talks to me or acts around me that makes me think of Dom. He told me he doesn’t have sexual feelings for Anne, and that he is struggling with the fact that he never had a loving male figure in his life and the older he gets the more he just wants to be held and loved by a strong, protective male. He insists he is not gay, but he was the one to bring the word up, so I know he has at least considered it. He has confided in me a lot, and doesn’t want me to say anything to Anne until he can figure everything out, but I thought if I could talk to Dom or someone who knows him, you could reassure me that I am just imagining things. Instead, I am just more convinced that there might be something to worry about.”

“Gills, sometimes one plus one doesn’t add up to two. Don’t freak out yet, K? I didn’t mean to make things worse. Maybe your friend just isn’t ready to get married and he is just looking for a reason to put it off. Maybe he’s afraid Anne will turn out like his mother. Maybe he just needs to find a father figure he can look up to and learn how to be a good husband and father. Or maybe he is gay. No matter what happens, though, you can’t do anything about it. He has to figure it out on his own.” With the sound of a horn in the background, Bella explained that she was supposed to take her father to the store. “Before you go, you just have to tell me. Why were you half naked that day in the basement?”

“That’s a secret I will take to my grave,” Tara swore, “but I promise it had nothing to do with sex.” Then she hung up the phone before Bella could get the truth out of her.

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“If anyone ever found out what happened that night, I would die of embarrassment". It was hard enough admitting to Dom that she had gotten a tattoo on her back without her parents permission, but then her shirt had somehow gotten fused with the scab. In trying to free herself, she had made her back bleed, A LOT, and panicked. Dom was trying to help her clean up and put some Neosporin on it, but her shirt kept getting in the way, so she just took it off and held it over her chest. When Bella came down the stairs, she was so busy trying to hide the tattoo that she forgot to keep her chest covered. Dom, in the panic of the moment, threw his hands across her chest. Of course, they both just looked more guilty, and although they swore they weren’t doing anything sexual, they wouldn’t tell anyone what was really going on. "I wonder what my future husband will think when he sees the E.T. permanently attached to my back? What a silly thing to do.”

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The next morning, just as Tara was about to ask Everett if they could have a serious talk, he hugged her and said, “Tar’ I don’t know how to thank you! After I talked to you last night, I prayed a lot and went to see the bishop again, and after I told him everything, he said some things that made me feel a lot better.”

“What do you mean ‘everything’?”, Tara asked. “Did you tell him about the football player thing?”

“Yes, everything. I told him how I am afraid of Anne turning out like my mom, how I miss having a male figure in my life, how I have no desire to fornicate with Anne, and all the rest of the things that have been worrying me. He said he understood why I would be questioning my worthiness, if I have been dealing with all that. He asked me about a mission again, but also told me that my mother has already informed him that if I go on a mission, she will stop going to church, so he understands why I am reluctant to go. He told me to pray about the mission, and also about marrying Anne, and get back to him next week.” He threw his arms in the air and shouted, “I feel so much better!”

Tara looked at all the students getting off their buses who were startled by the outburst, and said, “I am glad you are feeling better. Just don’t get yourself committed to Blackfoot South before you have a chance to propose. You are scaring the children.”

Everett looked at the other students and laughed, then asked Tara to walk to their lockers with him.

“I bought this before Christmas, intending to ask Anne on Valentines Day,” he said, showing Tara a gorgeous wedding set, “but when Bryan proposed to Shelley in January, everyone was so excited I didn’t want to steal their thunder. Besides, at that time I wasn’t really sure I should get married. Now I am ready to ask her, I have the ring, and I just need to come up with the perfect setting. Do you think it would be too hokey if I proposed on the old roller coaster when we go to Lagoon for our senior trip?”

Tara laughed and reminded him that Anne hated roller coasters. “Maybe you should talk to Jan. She would know better than anyone what scenario Anne has imagined in her head. Every woman has planned that moment down to the last second, knowing that no man could read her mind, but hoping that he does it right.”

“Maybe you are right. Definitely not the roller coaster. How about the water slide at Downey, then?”, he joked, then ducked to avoid the backpack Tara was swinging at his head.

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To Tara’s surprise, Jan said Anne dreamed of being proposed to on the chair lift at the ski resort they had visited during Christmas vacation. Everett couldn’t arrange that in the middle of summer, so he compromised by proposing on the Sky Tram at Lagoon. He secretly gave everyone in their class a note, telling them to be watching at two o’clock. It seemed the whole park was at a standstill for a few minutes, waiting, then when she said yes, they all started screaming and whistling and clapping so loud that Anne nearly fell out of the chair.

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They were married on Christmas Eve. Riley Joe was born in August, followed by Samuel in January, a year and a half later. Everyone thought their life was perfect, and Tara almost forgot the conversations she had with Everett and Bella until years later when Anne had her first heart attack. Her illness seemed to break the dam of feelings Everett had been denying. He moved out and filed for divorce before she had even left the hospital.

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